Being happy is hard, and for most of my life, I have let my circumstances decide my happiness for me. For a while here in Colombia, I was really struggling with homesickness, and I was letting my emotions and thoughts run me over. But as of about a week ago, something changed. I don't know what it was exactly- something just clicked. I realized that I can't expect this country, this town, these people to change to accommodate me and fix my homesickness- that's simply ridiculous, and goes against what exchange is really about. I realized that it is my responsibility as a human being and as an exchange student to take my happiness into my own hands. Happiness doesn't depend on where I am or what I'm doing- my happiness, or overall contentment, depends on one thing, and one thing only: Me. I can choose to be happy, I can choose to have a grateful attitude towards life, or I can choose to dwell on how I would like things to be or otherwise entrap myself in my head. Here in Colombia, I have decided to be happy. I suspended my most used social media, Instagram. I have made time to meditate every day, and exercise too. I have purposefully changed my attitude to be one of gratitude. These little steps have made such a big difference.
This past week has been amazing- and I believe it is because of these changes. I have spent less time on my phone and more time being here. I have gotten excited about little things like the shape of the clouds in the morning, or the way the sunlight hits the floor in the afternoon. I've been happy! My attitude has genuinely changed. There's really no good way to describe it. Happiness and contentment is something that I've always searched for, and I think it's something that everyone searches for. But really, it's not something that a person can search for because it's not something that one can "find". Happiness is right here with us, right here in this moment. I think we just have to open ourselves up to the possibility that what we have, right now, is enough. I believe that there is beauty in everything, and seeing this beauty and being thankful for it is really all that there is to being happy.
I am learning so much here every day. Not just cultural things, but also things about life in general. Before going on exchange, I could not have imagined the amount of personal growth that this experience creates. I am thankful for everything- the good times, the hard times, and the incredible amount of beauty I am surrounded by. I'm happy, and it's not thanks to anything nor anyone but myself. I think we can all be happy- we just have to open ourselves up to the possibility. So thank you to Colombia, thank you to this experience, and thank you, most of all, to this present moment. Thank you for teaching me about myself, about life, and about the world. It is truly amazing what life can teach us if we just pay attention.
A beautiful Colombian sunset from this past week:
